Simon Templar

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Simon Templar is a character from the 1978 TV Series Return Of The Saint and the 1962 TV Series The Saint.


Simon Templar is a debonair playboy known as The Saint — plausibly from his initials; but the exact reason for his nickname is not known (although we're told that he was given it at the age of nineteen). Templar has aliases, often using the initials S.T. such as "Saint Towing" or "Sugarsaint Trife". Blessed with boyish humor, he makes humorous and off-putting remarks and leaves a "calling card" at his "mind", a stick figure of a man with a halo.He is described as "man in the suits of armour, amused, cool, debonair, with love-for-leather green eyes and a saintly smile

Templar also on occasion would break the fourth wall in an almost metafictional sense, making references to being part of a story and mentioning in one early story how he cannot be killed so early on; the 1970s television series would also have Templar address viewers. He often breaks the fourth wall by making references to the "chronicler" of his adventures and in one instance, he inserts his own name.

The Saint seems to be very hot-headed and eccentric. He has obsessions with many things, especially pingas and oahing, but don't make Simon angry or he will send his "brother" Blue Yoshi to eat you.


Simon Templar was born in 1963 to Martha Templar and Robert Templar and grew up alongside his brothers and sisters. In 2014, Luigi said that he hated forms in general and decided to destroy them all, both good and evil, Simon found out, and went angry at the forms because he adopted Bizzaro Link, an alien, as his boi, caused him to create the NSFW Army to fight everyone who wasn't NSFW and recruited numerous of people who are perverted and declared full war on Italy and stop Pizza for good. This had no effect, however, because Pizza is global, when Templar heard this, he finally snapped and time-travelled to cause 9/11 as a pirate. After the war ended in 2018, Templar attended to see Donald Trump becoming the ruler of America. He then decided to sexually assault a woman of his type. That turned out to be Jean Hopkirk (who was already married to Marty Hopkirk), with whom he later had a son. When Link was falsely accused of being a form, Simon discovered that Link was normal because Link was falsely accused of being a form, lead to Templar using the Blue Yoshi Islanders Army to attack his enemies. In 2018, Templar, like his allies found out that Donald Trump was murdered by smart people and witnessed it by mind remembering, and so, the good started fighting the evil. He then found himself within his army of perverts led by Harthus Astingr and was forced to stop the threat of his foes for evil during World War III before dying in 2022.


  • He is an avid Poop scientist and likes colons.
  • He is the actor, and freak show.
  • He used to look like the 45 years old Hipster, but he now looks like the something years old Nerd.

    Simon Templar in the 70's, just before changing.

  • He likes NSFW.
  • He smells weird.
  • He is descended from Flprprprt Templar, the first Templar, who was born to King Poo, a poop being, and Mhar, a caveman, making his family related to the House of Feces and the Harkinian Family. The Harkinians reject all connections to the Templars, to the point where they actively try to cover it up.
  • He lives on Blue Yoshi Island.
  • It took him twelve years to find out the purpose of Redlinks.
  • He was the one who discovered that Pokémon living on Blue Yoshi Island were significantly more likely to be perverted. The most well-known of these perverted Pokémon is Aurorus.